Sunday, November 8, 2009

It’s Hugo’s Day!

It’s come to my attention that Hugo is offended that I publish so many posts when I could be learning about him and from him. I suppose this is true. Well, errors must be corrected and today is your lucky day Hugo. Now, before you get all excited, I have to say that Dictators have always repulsed me. Perhaps that is why I've been ignoring you. It may also be because I so desperately want to be a Dictator and yet I don’t see how it will ever happen.

A Coup Thwarter is a close second. As a Coup Thwarter, I could thwart coups all over the world. Alas I have to raise little kids instead. As stated, my real desire is to come to power via a coup, rule with an iron fist and have that prima dona pope kneel before and kiss my hand so I don't lop off his head. Excuse me. Where was I? Oh yes.

As far as listening to you, do it today, Hugo. I’m at the tail end of an H1N1 episode so I’m in a weakened and subdued state. I’ve lost a tremendous amount of weight from every part of my body except the gut which prevents me from observing that which is below. As my late cousin Denny used to say, “I take just enough Viagra to keep from peeing in my shoe.”

Perhaps you can tell from my rambling that I am giddy and light headed. I've had had nothing to eat for almost three days.

My point? The spot-light is yours Hugo. You have 24 hours to tell me what I need or should know about you and your journey through space and time. I feel my demeanor turning combative even as I type, so hurry, time is wasting. With that:

Ladies and Gentlemen - I give to you Hugo CHAVEZ

6 comments:

JD Curtis said...

I think "Hugo" went away on vacation and last stated that he won't be around for 3 weeks or so. That's if youre referring to the overbearing yet harmless Canadian that posts here.

Makarios said...

Well, I only know one Hugo and he's no mild mannered Canadian, like myself. Although there was a hurricane named Hugo but his nose and hair colour was different.

Oh, well, on the off chance that you are correct and I am wrong, I guess I’ll have to press on as per usual until Hugo once again protests. OR perhaps after a holiday and time to think, Mr. Chavez will come to appreciate my insights, humour, and overall wonderful personality. But I can tell you this, if he tries to go nuclear, even if it’s for peaceful reasons, well, then all bets are off. I might even start posting four times a day.

Gorth Satana said...

Rest. Drink water. If you have access to fruit, try and eat some.
H1N1 is usually milder than other seasonal flu.

You might get on with Chavez. Hugo Chavez is fond of saying his socialist policies have been borne with roots in "the teachings of Jesus Christ".

Makarios said...

Hugo Chavez is fond of saying his socialist policies have been borne with roots in "the teachings of Jesus Christ".

Ya I noticed that. Well, there's socialism and then there's Socialim.

JD Curtis said...

Hugo Chavez is fond of saying his socialist policies have been borne with roots in "the teachings of Jesus Christ".

Does this qualify as "liberation theology"? You know, the Sandinistas, Jeremiah Wright, etc.

Makarios said...

I feel like crap. Now two other kids have the piggy flue too.

I’m not sure how it happened, but somehow I’ve become part of a sleep deprivation experiment.

Chavez - you dog. You're not on a holiday you demented devil. You're in a concrete bunker conducting thought experiments on me. DRAT!
I wasn't - um - I'm going back to bed.