It never fails to amaze me how Christian couples (I'm not talking about secular marriages) point to the Bible to justify breaking up their family through divorce. They are quick to point out that God (who said by the way, “I hate divorce"), allowed divorce in cases of adultery. What these people fail to add, or choose to ignore is that He allows divorce because such people have “hard and evil hearts.”
Good grief, what an admission! Wouldn’t you rather change your character than admit to such a fault? Wouldn’t you? Of course, neither partner in a struggling marriage see ourselves as the one with the hard heart. Do we? In our eyes it’s always the other spouse who is the despicable mate.
Even when you listen to a person who has become attracted to someone who’s been divorced, it never occurs to that person that maybe they’re being attracted to a real schmuck. So enthralled and flattered are we when someone is attracted to US that to think there might be something fundamentally wrong with that person is beyond comprehension. So, people believe the smooth words of the one to whom they’re attracted, the one who’s convincingly explaining that it was h/her spouse who was the reason for the divorce.
Truth is, there are only three reasons for divorce.
. Either you are a very poor judge of character
. Or you are poor marriage material.
. Or both
And that is why Jesus says, If you get a divorce (and you might have to because living with a hard and evil heart can be dangerous) don’t get married again - AND don’t marry someone who has been divorced. Jesus is trying to protect us from experiencing and/or inflicting more harm. He’s trying to protect our children from being dragged through other dysfunctional relationships, relationships upon which they will model their future relationships.